DUCKS ANNOUNCE OFF-SEASON SIGNINGS Columbus Ducks Staff Writer - January 11, 2009 The Columbus Ducks celebrated the New Year by being one of the most active teams in the CAHL on the off-season free agent market. The Ducks have landed the big fish of this off-season. After he considered many options, including being offered the position of Numbassador to the Universe by President-Elect Barack Obama, Dr. Carl Paton has agreed to a contract with the Columbus Ducks. In order to protect the already fragile economy the terms of the contract are labeled confidential by the IRS, SEC, CIA, and Department of Defense. The one contract term released to the press that Paton and his agent the Greek God of the Sun, Apollo had to agree with is that Paton can not be the only person on the ice for the Ducks, he must play on a line with two other forwards, two defensemen, and a goalie. Paton will be appearing at a ticker tape parade to announce his signing. In order to make room for Dr. Paton the Ducks regrettably had to release grind-liner and crowd favorite Brett Patton. The Ducks were busy in week two of free agency swiping up Rob Oullette and Patrick Kennedy to deals for which the terms were not released, and Brad Wright to a long term deal. Oullette and Kennedy bring experience and skill to bolster the Ducks forward lines but it is the Wright signing that was the big newsmaker for the ducks in the second week of free agency. Wright will find his place on the forward lines for the Ducks. The Ducks are gambling he can play in the northern climates and on a controlled ice surface this winter, and they gambled a 4 year deal worth the rookie maximum and a requirement of Jambalaya making for all members of the team during the contract term. Look for Wright to join Columbus Ducks Captain John McConnell and Alternate Captain Bill Ross at a press conference later this week.